Oxford Dictionaries, self-appointed as “The world’s most trusted dictionaries”, has added an interesting selection of “words” to their online dictionaries.

I use the term “words” because while Oxford Dictionaries views the following examples as words, I do not. Did you know that a small piece of vanilla or butterscotch-flavored cake is referred to as a “blondie”? Were you as unaware as I that any shoe that is flat with a high, thick sole is called a “flatform”? Or that a situation that has been completely mismanaged and filled with massive mistakes and errors is dubbed an “omnishambles”?

And, apparently, any sexually provocative dance done in a low and squatted stance that involves the thrusting of the hips is what’s known as “twerking”. Now I would like to thank the Oxford Online Dictionary, not for helping me to define the words that I just listed, but for encouraging the bastardization of the English language as we know it.

Who in their right mind thought it was a good idea to allow such a collection of simple-minded noises into a publication, either online or print, that has the words “Oxford” and Dictionary” attached to it?

I could understand seeing such a wonderful list of gibberish being defined in “The Urban Dictionary”, because that’s what it’s for! A list of pop culture words that coincide with the foolish definitions society has attached to them.

That’s not what the Oxford Dictionaries are for. When people hear that a word is defined a certain way from an Oxford Dictionary they know that it is a definition that can be believed, that it’s a definition that they can have faith in. What are the requirements now?

That the words pop around enough chat rooms and Twitter feeds that it becomes a part of regular every day conversation in some random college-campus coffee houses?

In an article written by Ed Payne and Dorrine Mendoza for CNN, it’s written that “English is a living, breathing thing and words will evolve.” While I wholeheartedly agree that the English language is a language of change, I do NOT see the inclusion of such simple-minded words into a publication known worldwide for defining English as a step towards evolution.

I see it as a step in the opposite direction. “Twerking” while eating a “blondie” in a pair of “flatforms” while thinking about that party that was “omnishambles”? Does that sound like an evolved sentence to you? Sounds more like a devolved rambling to me.