This week we have a question from one of our readers:Dear Advice Nerd,
I got back my algebra test results on Monday and I had a feeling I did not do that well. I expected to maybe get at least 88%, but instead I got a lousy, low down, good for nothing score of 80%. I was so #%$&ing mad that I started popping off in the classroom, not at the teacher, but at my own self. Do not think that I did not want to blame the teacher. I needed someone to blame because it was too painful to except the fact that I felt like a dumb ass. Then I pouted through the rest of the class session like a little baby who soiled his shorts. Do you know how much studying I did? O.K. I will tell you! I completed about 5 million hours of homework which includes studying on the bus, break time at work, going to the john etc….. So here’s my dilemma, why do I get so stinking mad at myself and get so resentful at my abilities. I need a tip on how to handle not doing great all the time.
Exponentially Yours, Frustrated Exponent to the 0 Power.
Dear Frustrated Exponent to the 0 power,I understand your frustration. So here’s what I have to say to you:
Pissed off, are you?
The reason you get so mad is because you put so much effort and hard work into something you really wanted. It’s common for everyone to get upset when you don’t get what you want or what you believe you deserve. Anyone would be upset in your situation; you just need to control your outbursts in class. It’s not cool to be acting like a two-year-old whining in class.
Boy, you need to chill out
Let’s be frank, life isn’t fair. Sometimes you work so hard for something only to be short changed in the end. Yes it is frustrating, and yes it pisses you off. But what can you do about it?
Nothing.
You feel the way you feel. You can’t just suppress your feelings, so you were right to let them out. However, it was neither proper nor polite to your classmates that you went on a tirade during class. What you need to do is just chill, have some balls to take the grade like a man and breathe. If you think you were graded unfairly, then go talk to your teacher after class. Your teacher will be able to help you; she/he can show you what you did wrong and help correct it.
It’s a B man
So you got 80% instead of 88%, well guess what: They are both B’s. It’s a good grade, it’s better than a C. So why do you whine about it? You got the grade a lot of students want. So pick yourself up from the floor you slammed yourself on and deal with it. A grade is a grade. You worked hard aiming for a B and you got it.
So what now?
What you need to do is control your emotions, not suppress them, but have more self control for the sake of yourself and the people around you. If you’re not happy with something whether it is your grade or another object in your life, all you need to do is take a step back and review your options. There is always something there that can help you.
The last piece of advice I can give you is: Life isn’t fair. Deal with it.
This has been the advice nerd. If you got questions, I’ll answer them. Send all your questions to [email protected] and don’t forget to subject it advice nerd.