After a few good lessons, there’s always a quiz. So, boys and girls, here is your quick one-question quiz. Multiple choice. No essay because I’m the writer right now and I don’t like to share my spotlight.
1. What is the “Paris Burger?”
a) A fantasy where I’m sandwiched between two Paris Hiltons.
b) What Tom Cruise ate before proposing to Katie Holmes atop the Eiffel Tower.
c) The nickname of the Carl’s Jr. Spicy BBQ Burger.
The correct answer is C, although I wouldn’t blame you for marking A, or ceasing to read past B upon seeing Tom Cruise’s name.
Behind the “Paris Burger” nickname is a commercial featuring Paris Hilton washing a car in a way they just don’t do for the $6 I pay my local Chevron drive-thru. With a skimpy black swimsuit, some soap and a whole lot of water, Paris shows that she’s quite qualified to decide what deserves her catchphrase of “that’s hot.”
Paris’ undeniable star power is so strong, people pay more attention to her than the actual ad, and they wander into Carl’s Jr. unable to utter more than “Paris Burger, please.”
Besides being the only way to turn a greasy meat patty into something sexy, Paris is also the best example of this week’s lesson: It’s all in the package, baby.
Paris Hilton is the newest addition to a group already including stars like Anna Kournikova and Pamela Anderson; she is another celebrity whose status baffles the public that adores her. Sure, we love her, but we have no idea why.
In a perfect world, our love for her would be based purely on her talent, because talent would be enough. However, the world isn’t perfect. It’s not even fair most of the time. The rise to fame is much like a job search, where some may surpass others based on presentation, even though both are competent at the basic job function. Learn to accept this point because time spent complaining about the unappreciative public can be better spent on other things, like making yourself into a package that sells.
Take Miss Kournikova for example. Some may say that she is improperly placed in the above group, being that she was once the eighth-ranked women’s tennis player in the world. Currently, the eighth-ranked men’s pro tennis player is Gaston Gaudio. I doubt I will be seeing him gracing magazine stands or being a featured pinup in the near future, though. Anna’s star power well exceeds her tennis ability. Similarly, let your talent be a basis, not a limitation. To rise to the celebrity status you crave, take your talent, whatever it may be, and build upon it.
Let’s start where these ladies probably did: the fact that they all look great on paper. The many subscribers of Maxim magazine will vouch for this. You can benefit by following their lead and making sure you look equally good on a different kind of paper-your resume.
One thing that looks stunning on a resume is an internship. It’s a great way to hone your skills and get your foot in the door. Also, if you are lucky enough to land an internship at a place you would consider for future employment, you can take the opportunity to do an amazing job and work your way up.
Celebrities and their publicists know the key to fame is getting people to talk about you. Doing a great job at your internship is a much easier way to create a buzz than releasing a sex tape with a cheesy name.
Although you might not have a publicist of your own to help guide you in your rise to fame, you do have a large number of valuable resources at your disposal. Don’t be afraid to use them. No self-respecting diva would deny the help of a team of hair and makeup artists. Don’t be too stubborn to visit your career center, counselors, teachers, and even parents for advice. Aside from some oh-so-valuable insider information, they might be able to give you VIP access to some choice positions.
Once you narrow your choices to the few grand establishments that deserve you, don’t despair at the seemingly difficult task of getting a job. Critics have predicted the end of Paris’s fifteen minutes of fame countless times, and they will continue to do so as she racks up the endorsement deals and party invites. She survives because she knows the importance of staying in the forefront of public attention.
Likewise, make yourself a memorable candidate. On your resume, stand out by listing skills setting you apart from the other applicants, being multilingual, for example. Try to hand your job application directly to the hiring manager to make face-to-face contact. Keep any deadlines and promises you make to potential employers. Master the art of the follow-up call. Be persistent, but realize that the fine line between “dedicated” and “pushy” is as subtle as the difference between navy blue and black, and crossing the line is potentially disastrous.
Armed with these tips and a killer interview outfit, you will be a force to be reckoned with. Once you are standing at the top accepting your Oscar, endorsement deal, or first paycheck, just don’t forget to thank all the little people who made it happen.
