Ask Bonne

While in the process of compiling inquires from the students of Skyline, I decided to answer a couple of recent questions I have had from others seeking advice about their current situation. Remember to get your questions in as soon as possible. As you know, the Fall semester is coming to a close but if you get your questions in soon, then they will be posted in the first issues of the Spring semester. Send all inquires to: [email protected]

Dear A. Bonne,My girlfriend and I have been together for about six months now and everything is going great. We have a good time together, and I really like her. The problem is that I have an addiction to cigarettes. I have been smoking since junior high and it’s become a part of me. My girlfriend hates it; she says she doesn’t want a boyfriend that is going to die. Although she hasn’t come out and said it yet, I’m afraid she will soon make me choose between her and smoking. I want to quit, but I’ve tried before and failed. I care about her but I want her to want me for everything that I am, even the smoking. Any advice?Sincerely,The Marlboro Man

Well MM,I do think it is wrong for a girlfriend/boyfriend to ask their partner to choose between them and something in their partner’s life that they don’t like. Normally, I would say that she has no right asking you to choose between her and anything that makes you feel good. She should accept you for who you are if she genuinely cares. But, in this case, she has a point. If your girlfriend does give you this ultimatum, there should be no contest if you really care about her. It’s not as if she is asking you to stop seeing your friends, she is asking you to stop killing yourself. And you said yourself, you want to quit; so what are you waiting for? Now is the time, when you have someone that cares about you and I’m sure is willing to help you through it even when it gets tough.The best of luck to you, Bonne