The biggest tub of ice cream. Chocolate. A box of tissues. “The Notebook” on DVD. Now that’s the ultimate package for the first step of getting over a break up. No matter how hard you try and prepare yourself for moments like these, it still hurts. It will hurt, the pain will linger in your heart and you’ll feel as if it is the end of the world. We get it. There is nothing else to do, but to move on. Here are some steps to walk you through the process.
Tip 1: Embrace your emotions
You’re angry, sad, confused, so just let it out. Grab that tissue box and just let out all the emotions that you are feeling. Cry alone or even call a friend, watch “The Notebook” and cry together. You’ll feel much better once you’ve used a couple of boxes of tissues. You’re just one step closer to being your old self again.
Tip 2: Block him on all social media.
If you check his social media, you’re only hurting yourself and you’re just asking to see things that you know will hurt you. You’re at a point where you might over analyze unnecessary things. Jackie Flores, a recent heartbreakee said,” I realized when I still was his friend on Facebook, I was constantly checking his status and it just made me more and more miserable every single time.” So, back away from Twitter, Facebook and Instagram.
Tip 3: Do not make any contact
Keep your space. That means no texts, emails, instant messaging, calls, etc. This may be hard when you are intoxicated. Try giving your phone to a friend in the beginning of the night so you are not tempted to say things you don’t mean. Change his name to “Do Not Call” to set yourself a little reminder to really think about what you are about to do.
Tip 4: Stash away memory triggers
You don’t want to walk into your room and automatically think of your ex. Pack away his clothes, pictures on the wall, and the teddy bear he bought you for Valentine’s Day. Out of sight, out of mind. Doing this allows you to focus on the present.
Tip 5: Write a letter and burn it
You’re almost there. You have already avoided contacting him and even stashed away anything that triggers memories of you two. Now grab a piece of pen and paper and write whatever is on your mind. By the end of the letter, burn it. You’ll feel better and maybe even have some closure with that.
Tip 6: Find happiness in other areas in your life
He shouldn’t be your only happiness that was occurring in your life. Go out and hang out with family and friends, make a spontaneous trip to a place where you’ve always longed to go, or take a class that you were always curious about. Do whatever makes you realize that past relationship was only a part of your life and not all of it.
Tip 7: Socialize with friends
Being with your friends and around people that love you will definitely help you out during this tough time. Of course they don’t want to see you moping around and they’ll put out an extra effort to make sure you aren’t down in the dumps. Doing this will help you get back up on your two feet again.
Tip 8: Find a new hobby
When you keep your mind occupied and active, you won’t even remember your ex’s name. Use this time to go out for a run or take a boxing class! Jasmine Tolentino, a student at Skyline College said, ”Whenever I just need to get away from it all, I run. I put my headphones on, let the music take me away and run until I can’t run any longer. I don’t really have a destination, I just go.” So get up and keep it moving! You might just fall in love with a future hobby.
Tip 9: Keep your dignity
Most of the time we blame our ego on this particular situation. It is definitely normal to feel rejected or not good enough. Try and just refocus your thoughts about yourself and realize you are an amazing person. Don’t put yourself down. Know your worth.
Tip 10: Turn that negative into a positive
Of course you’re more prone to think negatively after a break up. That is natural. But this is the point where you have to train your thoughts and change that negative thinking to positive thinking. Adapt the way you think and you’re standing on your own two feet ready to live life on your own.
Broken hearts heal overtime and there’s no real way to avoid or prepare for it. You’ll cry, you’ll bury your face in your pillow and want to hide from the world, but with these ten tips, you’ll be able to get back standing on your own two feet and face the world head on.
